Neil Hopcroft

Not even your Homeland Security Blanket can save you from Dance Dance Immolation

The dutch are trying their hand at fame with an entry for Cycle facility of the month In other news, there is no other news. I’m still here, plotting my escape. More later.

‘Sacamajojo! I shall shrink your simian skull to a size such as this!’ An overanalysis of the international unit of rainforest destruction Last supper, collect all 310 souvenir trays “A timeless love story for our age: Boy meets Girl. Boy designs really big SUV for girl. Girl gets in a car accident and leaves Boy. […]

Yesterday I went to a Foundation 4 Success meeting. Normally this isn’t the kind of thing I’d go to but I’d been invited along by a friend and was intrigued about what was there. This was a meeting at the NEC in Birmingham, the first thing to notice was the car park, always something thats […]

My search for “Redditch roundabout of the month” earlier turned up the fabulous Dull Mens Club, where you can find, among recent updates: “Four more airports reporting in . . . the total number of airports covered in our worldwide report on airport luggage carousels increases to 366 . . . carousels rotating counterclockwise remains […]

“Construction of the tank had been overseen, or more accurately gazed stupidly at, by Arthur Jell, a bean counter with no technical background who was unable even to read blueprints. Anxious to complete the tank in time for the arrival of the first molasses shipment, Jell forwent the elementary precaution of filling it first with […]

(I can’t work out another “count the rings and scars” pun so you’ll have to make do with…) This isn’t the most efficient way to visualise share price movements. …indeed theres a bunch of nice projects going on in the swamp…

East-17 singer punctures lung in freak potato accident

A few weeks back I was worrying that there might be some kinds of actions to prevent people taking photographs in public places. Of course, I shouldn’t’ve worried …that could never happen here. Could it?